Lest We Forget

Well over a year ago, when OccDoc was in Afghanistan, we decided my consolation prize for his deployment would be laser hair removal. So, he got me (or told me to buy for myself) a package of 6 laser treatments for my lower legs and, gasp, my bikini line…um…yeah…bikini line, if I was brazilian. Um, laser hair removal is uncomfortable at best…okay, fine…more like blindingly painful. After a few treatments I felt like doing naked, face-down snow angels in the freshly fallen snow to help with the pain. Yeah, it hurt a lot, but I persevered and finished my 6 treatments. But…

I was told this before I started, but you need touch ups to get rid of ALL the hair in your target zones. I have a few hairs on my legs and some left in the bikini zone that have not been blasted away yet. I’ve only had to shave my legs 3 times in the past 12 months. It’s been awesome, but there are still a few hairs remaining. Because of the searing pain and the expense I held off on my touch up laser treatments. They actually really aren’t that expensive, so it was mainly the pain I was trying to avoid. Fine, it was all pain I was avoiding. For the touch ups I need to go to the same place I originally got the treatments, meaning when we move away after OccDoc’s out of the army I probably won’t get the touch ups. Now or never, pretty much.

I went for my touch ups yesterday. Holy shit. Yup, it was still painful as ever. And can you ever really get over the scent of burned hair? Singed pubs, anyone? No, no you cannot. To top it off, my laser tech asked me where I’ve been since it’s been well over a year since my final package treatment (Feb 2010). Um, I’ve been getting fertility treatments so I didn’t really feel like subjecting myself to extreme physical pain on top of the extreme emotional pain I was having. My technician then told me she was adopted, so I’m not really sure if she told me that to let me know she can relate or why exactly. I didn’t have the brain power to figure it out when I was trying to keep the screaming inside my head. It takes a lot of focus to keep those things from slipping out!

I’m still on the fence if I’ll go back for another touch up (if needed) before we do our next fertility treatment. Yet another reason I want to be pregnant like now: So I don’t have to feel guilty about getting my laser touch ups.

As OccDoc told me last night when I was telling him about my experience, ‘Ah, the price of beauty.‘ Ain’t that the freaking truth?

About Michelle

I'm Michelle, formerly the annoyed army wife. Join me as transition into the next phase of life:a husband in a white coat and tie instead of ACUs, a home of our own located anywhere we please (that needs a lot of work), and my life as a newish, somewhat crunchy mama. I'm, well, pessimistic about this next phase but with all the sarcasm and sass you've come to know and love.


  1. I had no idea that laser hair removal was painful! Huh. You learn something new every day.

  2. “Singed pubes, anyone?” Favorite. Line. Ever.

    Thank you for the highlight of my morning.

    Oh, and for solidifying the fact that I’ll stick to my old fashioned razor and wax treatments. :)

  3. I’m considering getting laser hair removal but ahhh it’s going to hurt and I don’t want it to!

  4. NOT what I needed to be reminded about today. I am starting mine this coming week. From the test spot they did it was not that bad though, it just felt like they were spitting hot soup on me.

  5. I distinctly remember the phrase “face down snow angels in the snow”. And yeah… when I talk about infertility, people mention their adoption stories. I get it and I think it does help me a little, but sometimes it just makes me feel guilty for wanting a baby of our own and what we’re willing to do for it.

  6. OMG! I had thought about getting it done back in 07 for the facial hair I have thanks to the hormones but ummm…I’m a chicken when it comes to pain so I think I’ll just pluck the little I have and shave my legs once a week. My leg hair is that sparse thankfully.

  7. I’ve had laser hair removal on my face (chin, jawline, sideburns, upper lip). One of the lovely side effects of my infertility problems is extreme male pattern body hair. My super hairy arms and legs are manageable with waxing and shaving, but the 5 o’clock shadow on my face was getting out of control. (sadly, I’m so NOT exaggerating about that….) After years of shaving my face every morning (did i mention my extremely sensitive skin and thus horrible razor burn all over my face? yeah…), and waxing (painful and NOT permanent) AND electrolysis (horrifyingly, disturbingly, torturously painful – this sh*t should be illegal), I finally saved enough pennies for the laser hair removal for my face. While it was uncomfortable, I thankfully didn’t find it as painful as electrolysis or even waxing. The zapping does hurt, but it goes away pretty quickly. The lasting pain of waxing or electrolysis was much more unbearable for me. You’re lucky you got it for your legs and bikini….That’s what I”m saving for next! :-)